Friday, October 29, 2010

MAPP Class: Week Three

MAPP CLASS
I'll probably find myself saying this as we go through each week but I would have to say that our class this past Thursday was one of the most eye opening classes we've had yet. The topic: Becoming a Loss Expert. We talked a lot about grieving and behaviors that you might see in children that are in foster care and why they have some of the behaviors they do. And while this was the main subject and while we learned how to help children or youth cope with the different stages of grieve we were challenged to revisit and face some of the losses we may of had in our owns lives so that we can better help a child who has faced a loss or even multiple losses. And these losses could range anywhere from losing a loved one, to divorce, to an unexpected illness, to inferility, to miscarriages, to car accidents and to even being abandoned as a child. It turned out to be a bit of an emotional night as one guy shared about his dad being in a car accident almost two years ago and how he dealt with that, another lady shared about her father being diagnosed with cancer, while another lady shared about a pastor she had known all her life in the church she grew up in and after 25 years just up and left and how it really broke her faith apart in many ways...loss can come in many shapes and forms but it's how we deal with it, it's how we process it and it's the things we gain in those losses that shape us to be who God wants us to be and it's those losses and gains that shape us into the parent that we will be to our children and even in our case, the leaders we will be to our students. It was a great class and we walked away gaining a lot more knowledge about children who experience loss. Even through these classes I find myself striving to be a better mom to Emilee. Striving to be more patient with her and striving to always let her know she is loved. While I've always wanted to be the best parent that I can to my child, this class has really challenged me to be the best mom and best role model I could possibly be. Hearing some of these children's stories has literally taken my heart and broke it into a million pieces and all I want to do after that is come home and just hold my sweet child and let her know how loved and what a precious gift she is to me and her daddy.

Scrapbook
The scrapbook is coming along! I think I'm about at the halfway mark with it. I've finished 13 out of 29 pages that will be in it so I'm really hoping by the time the holidays hit I will be finished. Between school, adoption classes/homework, church stuff and just every day life I'm trying to squeeze in as much time as I can with it and so far have been pretty successful in doing that. As promised in the last blog, I said I would post a couple of sneak peek pictures of a couple of the pages so here they are!

This is the first page in our scrapbook of our family. Lisa Stockton, with Stockton Photography, came to the house and took a few shots of us. She did an excellent job and we appreciate her so very much!! There were definitely some great pictures to put in our scrapbook!


These are some pictures of Justin when he was a baby and a toddler. The next page is pictures of Justin as an adult and pictures with Emilee. Wasn't he a cutie? :)


Of course we can't leave our sweet Bella out of the picture!


Last but not least, my work station! Although I've loved putting this scrapbook togehter I'm looking foward to having my table back! Luckily we haven't had any company to where we'd need to use this table!

I guess that about sums it up for now! Later on in the week I'll post our letter to the baby that we had to write and turn it. Justin wrote most of it and it is simply precious. Can't wait to share it with you! Thank you all for your continued prayers! God is working in our hearts and lives daily and we can't wait to continue to see how all of this unfolds...especially after the holidays end and we get closer to getting a new addition to our family!

Blessings!!

Friday, October 22, 2010

MAPP Class: Week Two

This past Thursday was our second adoption class out of ten that we will be attending. As mentioned before, there are 10 couples in this class and I would say about 5 of those couples are there to become foster parents and the other 5 (including us) are there seeking adoption. With that said, Thursday night's class really hit on fostering and not only how it works, but how easy it can actually become for a typical, normal family to really start on the downfall and lose their children. Most of the class consisted of a "role play" that almost everyone ended up having to participate in and it actually became very emotional, especially since you were in character. Basically, it started off as a normal, loving family and the dad lost his job. There was a snowball effect and things started going downhill fast. The parents starting fighting, both were stressed with their financial situation and were both handling the situation in their own different way. This eventually led to them hitting their children a couple of times, which led to going to the emergency room, which eventually led to their children being taken away and put in a foster care home. The foster parents helped the children with the issues they were facing while the caseworker worked with the parents to help them get counseling and get them back on their feet so that their family could eventually be reunified. All in all, it was a very eye opening and emotional experience. My heart has been touched and softened like never before for children who are taken away from their parents and placed in home with people they don't know and who are completely and totally confused as to what's going on. We watched a video with children who talked about their foster care experiences and another child who was finally adopted at the age of 15...these children just want to be loved and cared for. I don't know that Justin and I are called to become foster parents, but once again, it is confirmed in my heart and soul that we are on the right path that God wants us to be in seeking to adopt a child. It's such a peaceful place to be in. I'm also really loving the interaction that we're able to have with our caseworker and the other couples in the class. Speaking of other couples in the class...Justin and I have hit it off with a really nice couple in the class that lives there in Lakeland. We talked for a bit after class and we were invited to their house for dinner next week before classes start so we're really looking forward to that opportunity.

While this is only our second week in class, and while this is an adoption/foster care class, I believe that this would be an excellent class for any parent with children to take. I truly believe that these classes are not only going to help us in preparing our home for our future child, but they are going to help us to become better parents to the child that we care for and nurture daily right now.

I've really been working hard in getting our scrapbook done and maybe next week I'll be able to share a little "sneak peek" at a couple of our pages. So far I've completed 9 pages with several more to go. It's really starting to come together and I can't wait to see the finished product. In class last night, we turned in our "family profile" and with our family profile we had to turn in a page that Emilee had to draw and color, a floor plan of our house, pictures of our house as well as a letter to the baby (later on we will have to write a letter to the birth mom). Justin did most of the writing (I threw my thoughts in) but he did a lovely job of putting it together and writing the perfect letter about our family, town and church family to our soon-to-be little one. I may have to share it one day as a blog.

I think all of this just about sums up our class, as well as the progress on our scrapbook and family profile. We're really looking forward to next week and I'm looking forward to continuing to share in our journey with you...

Sunday, October 17, 2010

And the journey begins...

Justin and I are in the process of seeking to adopt a baby. The next several months we have a lot of work to be done before everything is finalized and we're actually able to be matched to a potential birth mom. The two big things that we're doing right now are attending classes, every Thursday in Lakeland from 6pm-9pm (which also includes one Saturday class). This past Thursday was our first class to attend (besides the orientation class we already attended) and much to my surprise it was actually very enjoyable and a lot of fun. When I first heard we had to take a 30-hour class I thought, "Three hours??"...but the time goes by so quickly it doesn't even seem that long at all. There are 9 other couples in our class...and a little more than half are actually in there seeking to be foster parents. Our teacher, who is also our caseworker, keeps things interesting with stories, interaction and fun activities. Besides the fact that I'm looking forward to Thursday as a "mini date night" with Justin, the classes are definitely something that we will not only benefit from individually, but we'll also grow together as a couple as we seek to provide the best home for Emilee and our future little one. Along with our class we will have "homework" to do every week which mostly consists of different scenarios and how we would handle those situations individually and as a couple. Along with this weeks homework includes our "Family Profile" which consists of at least 3-4 hours worth of questions ranging from everything to our childhood and growing up, how we currently parent and discipline our child, to questions to our marriage and how we communicate and get along as a family. You name it, it's a question that is probably being asked. But it's definitely something that will be worth all the hours we will be putting into all of this.

The second thing we're currently working on is our "Adoption Profile Scrapbook" which is composed of pictures of our family which will include several family pictures, different activities we like to do, pictures of our parents and siblings, a few pictures of Justin and I growing up as well as a few pictures from our wedding. This scrapbook will be shown to potential birth moms who then decide if they're "interested" in knowing more about our family and will then set up and interview process with us and if she likes us and feels comfortable with us then we go from there and form a plan as far as if we'll be in the delivery room when she gives birth and many other important details which go into the "birthing" plan.

All in all, we're super excited. We have a long journey ahead of us...we're not completely sure what all this journey is going to hold as far as bumps we may hit in the road but one things for sure...at the end of the road will be the perfect baby that God has intended for our family. We're already praying for this child and this birthmom...I don't have any clue what this baby is going to look like, or when he/she is going to be born but what I do know is that God is already forming him/her and making this child perfect for our family.